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User blog:Jackythejack/My Texan Valentine Massacre: Leatherface vs. Harry Warden
Following the theme of Halloween for one more battle (even though it's not October now), today we're going to be met with two insane individuals who, as they always do, take their anger and pain out on others. Two different cases, one from a messed up family and one born from a murder. Today we're going to pit two men with admittedly impractical, but effective, weapons. Bubba: More commonly known a Leatherface, he's the Sawyer family's heavy hitter. A mentally slow cannibal with a chainsaw. vs. Harry Warden: '''A valentine killer taking the appearance of a miner from the town Valentine Bluffs. An insane man weilding a pickaxe. Leatherface Bubba was always bullied when he was younger, and when you take a look at all of the physical and mental problems he has, it's no wonder he fell victim to countless amounts of bullying. Not only did he suffer from mental retardation, but he was also unable to speak in general. He was also victim to a skin disease, which would cause tumors to grow along his face and other severe deformities which would make him grow insecure in his own face. Being bullied for most of his life, he grew to be a recluse and stayed with his family, who...weren't exactly the best people on earth. Growing up, Bubba would serve as a butcher for the Sawyer family. It only made sense. After all, Bubba was incredibly strong, and he was incredibly big. If that doesn't describe a classic butcher than I don't know what does. Now, with that being said, there were...a few issues. You see, the Sawyer family weren't really butchers. They'd just slaughter the cow for the butchers instead. The problem was...new inventions lead to job cuts, and people going out of business. The Sawyer family was unfortunately one of these people. They were out of a job and any way to make money. Because of this, of course, they turned to cannibalism! They'd lead unsuspecting groups into their house before murdering them and cutting them up into pieces, using their bones to make furniture or macabre decorations, while Leatherface would get a new hobby. Due to the insecurities in his face, and the fact that he was normally the one to cut up the bodies anyways, Bubba here would cut the face off of the corpses he was given, making them into disgusting masks so that he could hide his true face, hence where he got his name...Leatherface. Though, being a butcher and a killer, Bubba has to have some good weapons for him. Let's discuss. '''Chainsaw: '''The bread and butter of any good, iconic slasher. Bubba does most of his dirty work via this chainsaw, with a pull of a cord and a very loud noise, Bubba can tear into his opponents with this lovely weapon, which he wields with only one hand. It weighs about ten pounds and is a whopping 36 inches. A weapon of pure slaughter. '''Cleaver: Of course, this is the staple item for any butcher worth his salt, and it works as a deadly weapon in the hands of this killer cannibal. A twelve inch blade which can lop off a limb with a strong, well placed slash. Sledgehammer: Or, I suppose a mallet would be a better name for this. Either way, a hammer wielded by this big cannibal is going to kill with one quick blow to the head. The hammer, in this case, is going to be sixteen inches long. Harry Warden Harry Warden isn't exactly a real person. Well, not in this context, at least. You see, Harry Warden used to be a simple miner, but one day, due to the neglect of two supervisors that went to the Valentine's Day Dance, him and four other miners were trapped down in the mine. While truly a terrible situation, Harry Warden did what he had to do to survive, and that was to kill the other miners and eat their flesh. I mean...gotta do what you have to to survive, I suppose. Later on, after he had escaped, Harry Warden murdered the two supervisors that put him in that situation in the first place. Later, he would vow that he was going to kill again if the Dance was held once more. Twenty years after the incident, there was a man by the name of Axel Palmer. He was the son of one of the supervisors that Henry Warden killed, and even saw the man murder his father. The loss of his father also caused him to hate the Valentine's Day Dance, and so he donned the gas mask that Warden used, and went under the alias of Harry Warden to commit several murders in his hometown. Later, he is trapped under some rubble, and is about to be arrested. Before he could pay for his crimes, however, he cut off his arm and ran off, still being alive and out there to this day. With such a brutal killer, they have to have some brutal weapons. Let's take a look, shall we? Pickaxe: The standard tool of any miner, which can easily turn into something deadly if put in the wrong hands. With a firm handle made out of wood and a metal point to plunge into his victims, this pickax ecome in at three feet in length and weighs a good five pounds. A deadly thing to be swinging around. Knife: By no means a weapon used for actual combat, but Harry was able to use this to cut his arm off, so it must be for something, right? It's a 14 inch blade that is generally used as a last resort, as Harry seems to just...not want to use it. Well, we can't really blame him, can we? A pickaxe is already a pretty cool weapon. Nail Gun: Now, I know that some people would think that anything that could be used as a gun against a murderous cannibal with only melee weapons would be pretty bad, but we have been informed by a hippo we found in the wild that this gun actually works like it's supposed to, where you can only use it if it's pressed up against a surface, and the nails don't really fly out like you'd expect them to. And even if they could do that, Harry doesn't use it like that. X-Factors Physicality Leatherface is clearly a very strong opponent in this fight. He can effortlessly drag corpses and bodies with them resisting his grasp, and he's even tough enough to use that bulk of his and run through a wall. Pretty intense. He's also capable of chasing victims for a considerably long time. And he's durable as well, being able to take a chainsaw to the gut, or to the leg, and treating it with very little severity. Though this can probably be a factor of his retardation not exactly knowing of a way to process pain. Harry Warden, meanwhile, while not terribly strong, is able to do things that no man should really be able to do, such as shove a shower head through someones skull, which is...fucking disgusting, to be honest. He also has no problem chasing his future victims, or surviving certain painful situations like getting his arm cut off after it had been trapped under rubble. Intelligence This is the part where Bubba doesn't really do well. You see, Bubba is mentally retarded. No matter how nice you want to be about it, he doesn't really do anything that requires more than a basic mental capacity, and he can't even really form sentences, mostly just screaming at people and murdering them. Not exactly the nicest thing. Harry, meanwhile, is actually somewhat intelligent. He knows to employ stealth tactics on his victims to get the element of surprise, and he can use parts of his environment to help him out in killing or frightening someone. He was even able to fake his own death, or disable an escape route that one of his victims was going to take, however that doesn't mean that he can't make mistakes, like getting his pickaxe stuck... Experience Leatherface doesn't really have a lot of experience, as you could probably guess given the situation he is in. He has been killing for a while now, but most of his victims don't really have any means to defend themselves, and because of this you cant really call it relevant experience, but he does know how to kill either way. Harry, meanwhile, has had a very similar experience, where he...doesn't have much of it. Most of his victims didn't have a way to defend themselves and he hasn't been in many fights at all. He has been in a fist fight once or twice, and he actually won those scenarios, but that is with fists, and Leatherface probably isn't going to be one to deck Harry in the face. Voting Rules Voting ends either on the 21st or whenever I feel like it so there's that. Uh...dunno what else to say, really. Hope Pygmy enjoys this- The Fight It was a misty day at the camp, with a fog rolling across the lake and spreading across the campsite like some growing darkness, as if it was a living being. No one had been to the camp in a long time. Not since the murders, at least. No one would bother to check on the camp, or even explore it. They wouldn't find the flags they had used to mark the dead bodies, nor would they find the shrine dedicated to a decomposing, long dead head. After all, there was no reason for them to come to this camp, right? Which made it all the more confusing that Harry found himself there, and the miner himself didn't even know how he got there. All he knew was that he woke up in one of the cabins wearing the miner outfit, with his pickaxe and several other weapons nearby. He had woken up to see a post-it note next to his pickaxe. On the note was the words KILL HIM!! ''written in red ink. Harry didn't pay much attention to it at the time, crumbling it up and tossing it away. Though, only a few minutes later, when he was exploring the buildings of this camp, his mind couldn't help but to wander. Specifically, it was focusing on that note that he had received. Why was he being tasked with killing someone? Who was he supposed to kill? How did he end up here? Should he be worried? His paranoia fueled his thoughts, but those thoughts were quickly interrupted when he heard loud footsteps echoing out through the camp, and those footsteps were getting louder. They were heading right towards him, from behind. Harry turned around just in time to see a man with a disgusting looking skin mask on his face chage at him from within the fog, wielding a cleaver. The man screamed as he approached Harry and swiped in his direction. Harry stumbled backwards, just barely avoiding the attack in exchange for his balance. He fell backwards, landing on his back and dropping his pickaxe in the process. The masked man quickly slashed towards the ground with his cleaver, but Harry was able to move out of the way and pull out his knife. He took heavy breaths. What the fuck was going on here? He was swung at once again, but Harry avoided it once more and swiped at the man's exposed arm. though he knew that he made contact and cut the skin, the man didn't even flinch. He just cried out once again and actually punched Harry in the face this time. Not expecting the blow, Harry stumbled back, opening himiself up to an attack from the cleaver. The man swung once more, and it hit Harry right in the stomach. Harry cried out in pain as his body tensed up. He gripped his knife tightly and stabbed it into the bigger man's arm, causing him to let go of his cleaver and take a step back, screaming in pain as he moved to forcefully yank the knife out. Harry soon realized that he wasn't going to get that knife back anytime soon. Shit...that was a terrible idea. The miner pulled the cleaver out of his stomach and felt the warm blood travel down his torso. He ended up tossing the cleaver at the beheamoth of a man. This distracted the skin-face long enough for him to get his pickaxe back and run off into the fog, with the man screaming after him as he moved to retrieve his cleaver, dropping the knife on the ground. ... Leatherface was unable to chase after the man. Try as he might, shortly after the man ran into the fog, Leatherface lost all signs of him. This fog was making it uncomfortable to see, and considering the cannibal's already limited mental capacity, he couldn't find it in him to actually chase someone down, especially in new territory. He'd have to understand how the camp worked before he could even hope to chase someone. Leatherface instead chose to move across the camp, effectively staking it out as he tried to find the man wearing the mask. He didn't know who the man was, but frankly he didn't care. If anything, he was scared, and this man posed as a very clear threat, and he wanted to make sure that the threat was going to disappear. The cannibal continued to travel from cabin to cabin, kicking down doors and looking around the rooms. He'd find a couple of things that didn't really interest him, like old knives and blankets and rope, and one time he even found what looked to be a decomposing corpse, though he paid it no mind. He only had his cleaver, at the moment. He wanted something better, if he could find it. It wasn't long until Bubba happened to find the toolshed for the camp. Despite the area around the shed looking completely decrepit and abandoned, what he found in the toolshed looked as good as new. There, on one of the workbenches, was a chainsaw, and nearby was a sledgehammer. Bubba moved with surprising speed as he ran to the chainsaw and picked it up, as well as picking up the sledgehammer. Now much more armed and a lot more comfortable, Leatherface moved out of the toolshed and went to go kill the threat so that he wouldn't be nearly as scared as before. This time, Leatherface didn't show nearly as much fear. He had something much more comfortable, that was going to make a hell of a lot of noise that would scare just about anyone around him. He stomped through the grounds of the camp, though still not knowing the layout to heart, of course. His eyes were peeled for anything that looked like it wanted to kill him. Eventually, though, he stopped and stared at the outter walls of one of the cabins. After a few moments of silent staring, he heard what sounded like the floor creaking. Perhaps he was behind that wall...? ... Harry was, in fact, behind that wall, but he was trying to be as silent as possible. When he heard the floorboards creak, he stopped moving completely and tried to even out his weight. His plan was to weight until the big lug of a man would enter the cabin, where he could eliminate him with his nailgun, but whether or not that was going to work was beyond his knowledge. Just from that one encounter with him, which he was lucky to have even survived, he could tell that monster was going to be tough to take down. Though, Harry was a firm believer of the element of surprise. It helped him out before, so it could help him out again. With a deep breath, Harry turned his entire body to face the door to the cabin, which was currently closed and blocking out anyone's view if they wanted to look into the cabin. With the windows all blocked up, this was the perfect hiding place. Now he just needed his nail gun. The nail gun didn't really fit anywhere on his person, so he had to stuff it in his pocket and hoped that it didn't fall out. By some miracle, it hadn't fallen out yet, and he grabbed the nail gun and took it out of his pocket. Though, just as he was preparing it and getting ready to use it, there was a loud, ear shattering noise. ''BRRRRRRRR! The noise, which sounded like an engine starting up, surprised Harry and caused him to drop his nail gun. It fell to the ground with a loud clatter. Surely anyone nearby would've been able to hear that. Harry starting muttering expletives as he bent over to pick up the nail gun. This was just as there was a loud CRASH! A quick look up revealed that Leatherface, instead of just taking the door like a normal person would, blasted through the old and weakening walls of the cabin. They gave way easily under the charging man's weight after years of neglect, and Bubba roared as he waved his chainsaw around the moment he got into the room. Harry was silently panicking as he decided to ignore the nail gun and instead run over to his pickaxe, which was leaning against the wall. He held it in two hand and waited for the man to come at him, which Bubba did. He ran right towards Harry, chainsaw roaring out hungrily to cut into some flesh. Harry avoided the initial swing, if only because Leatherface was being predictable. Harry, though lacking much upper body strength, was able ot lift his pickaxe over his head and slam it down towards Bubba. It snagged on some of his close and the sharp point of the axe was able to leave a gash across Leatherface's chest, but the cannibal merely roared out in pain and pushed Harry away from him, causing him to completely let go of his pickaxe. Harry almost lost his balance again, but was able to regain it and pull out his nail gun. He aimed it at Bubba and pulled the trigger, hoping it was close enough to be accurate with it. Thankfully, he was. It hit Bubba dead in the leg, but to Harry's dismay, the Texan didn't even react to it as he charged forward. Harry couldn't back up in time and Bubba swiped his chainsaw at Harry's arm. Harry screamed out in pain as his arm was cut down the middle, causing it to squirt blood on the floor of the cabin. He turned around and ran away from Leatherface, grasping the spot where his hand used to be. He didn't know where he was going in the cabin, though, and quickly found himself in a dead end, with Leatherface close behind him. Harry turned around to see the cannibal rush into the room and directly towards him. He tried his best to maneuver out of the way of Leatherface to rush out of the room, but Bubba was surprisingly agile. The Texan moved his chainsaw to the side and hit Harry in the leg, causing him to fall and tumble to the ground. Knowing that he was going to win, Leatherface raised his chainsaw up, cried out in victory, and slammed his chainsaw down on the miner. The entire camp would be filled with the roar of a chainsaw and Harry screaming in pain, which would eventually be cut short as the deed was done, with a now dismembered body and a pool of blood on the cabin floor. Leatherface, now sure that he was safe, raised his chainsaw up and screamed once again. He was the victor! Expert's Opinion The voters believed that, while Leatherface was clearly at a mental disadvantage, his brute force and his better arsenal took the victory over Harry. Many had also believed that his bigger experience murdering people throughout the years could give him the upper hand as well, but overall most felt that Harry was generally just incompetent at what he did. Category:Blog posts